I suck

I blow at Blogger! I am not a computer whizz and have nooooooo idea how to format shit as I'm sure you all may have noticed! Any suggestions for a dumb blonde like me? Be nice! :P

Continuation and update

• Last post was about dieting and hunger! A friend read it and asked if I was talking about them and I just dismissed it with a simple, confused 'no' without thinking why they asked til later. I came on just now to update and reread it and was like 'wtf?!.. if you think that's about you then bitch you be starvin yourself!' :P However, I'm sure, if I elaborate, everyone who has ever seriously watched their weight will see themselves!!
• I HATE the word diet. I hate even saying that I'm on a diet. I always judge people when they say that. I don't think the word diet, or my definition of it, is positive. It just makes me think deprivation, rules, limitations and hunger. Strict, scary, horrible!
• Rules are not for me. The only rules I can ever follow are the ones I make because they are so flexible! There are certain limitations that need to be in place in my life but, ultimately, I live to be happy. Obsessing over every last calorie and every lost pound is NOT happiness to me!
• That's not me dismissing diets or the approaches to weightloss that work for other people. My housemate is losing shitloads of weight on Unislim (Similar idea to Weight Watchers) and looking damn hot! And that shit ain't easy! The thought strikes fear in me because of the regimentedness. Numbers and targets and weighing foods and rules, even the fact that you have to be somewhere at a specific time and place every week!
• I am NOT saying that my housemate or people who go to Unislim or WW or whatever are too hardcore or whatever, though I definitely think my hobag housemate could cut herself an occassional break on the exceptionally rare weeks she doesn't achieve yet another giant weightloss! (She reads this and knows that I am calling her a hobag in an affectionate way... that and she's a bitch! :P) My problem with the regime part, is the failure aspect.
• At various points in my weightloss, I got really into weighing myself! That's what I consider being 'on a diet'. When you are rating your progress on numbers there is always a slight feeling that if you don't lose weight every week you are failing or setting yourself back or whatever. And that's the problem where I'm concerned- the pressure of it spurs you on when you do well and the negative shit that brings into your mind- I didnt lose weight this week/month. I suck. I am going to eat only grapes or whatever. I would not be able to do that but ya know what I'm getting at.
• You cant ignore the numbers. You would be quite the fool to do that! I still weigh myself to check which way I'm moving. But I HATE getting obsessive about the weighing part. I hate doing that when I know I eat well 80% of the time and I really enjoy working out! Some weeks the 80% dips to 50% and then I give myself a talking to and get back on track! I know that's not an approach for everyone but it stops me getting bogged down in feeling like I suck when I 'fail'.
• So, scratch that....when I wrote last time, it WAS about you, all of you, anyone who thinks it applies to them- it probably does. It wasnt AIMED at anyone though- nobody but the monsters in my mind. It was a general reference to shitty habits that don't solve anything long-term. Shit that loads of people do. It was me having a word with myself over feeling crappy for barely losing weight in 2011 when the important thing was that I was looking better and living better. I wasn't considering starving or whatever I refered to. I was talking myself out of falling into a pity party and likening pity parties to all the other shitty 'diet' habits that exist! Which is an important talk to have with myself considering I AM NOT ON A DIET!
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• AND NOW FOR THE UPDATE:
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• I'm back at 76kg! Hhahaha! Such a plateau number-wise! However, I think I'm proving myself right here- SIZE 12! Kinda proves the point right?! I'm still a 14 in trousers but my 14s are roomier than they were a month ago. I tried on stuff today in the shop- sizes 14 and 12. I walked out with only 12s. So negativity, obsessive weighing and forbidden foods can suck my balls! Weightloss is ultimately about your own self control. Have your cake (or chinese food in my case), eat it too, then don't have cake again til you REALLY want it (Sometimes it may be 2 days later but it happens.) and then enjoy it all the more! It seems to be working for me even if that dick of a scales won't agree! :P

Starving ain't my bag baby

I am still on plateau and I dont even care!

I refuse to be an obsessive dieter. I'm not going to constantly beat myself up over the things I eat for enjoyment and not nutrition. So actually I'm not going to be a dieter! I don't want to be on a diet for life. How many people can make that a success? Real success in weight loss, from what I've heard, involves an overhaul of your habits and does not happen overnight! I am not going to hang around the place feeling hungry just so I can say a weigh a pound less! Who the fuck cares?! I look better and I'm changing my lifestyle to make myself happier. I'm cutting out my bad habits slowly and building new ones but I'm not going to cut things out or go to bed starving or barely eat for a couple of days because I ate 300 calories too many one day. It's not a race to lose weight.

I know I'm going to hit goal this year- it's not even a question in my mind because I'm not going back. Some days I eat shitty and then I reach my quota and eat healthily for a while again BECAUSE I WANT TO! I don't physically feel good if I eat too much grease or sugar so, if I do it for a couple of days that's enough and I get back on track! There is faaar too much negativity surrounding the whole diet/ weight loss thing and I don't think it's ok. You shouldn't torture yourself- mentally or physically. Life is way too fucking short!!!

So, so fucking what if I don't lose weight this week.. or next week... or next month. I know what direction I'm moving in and that's REAL progress.

Weight/fitness update

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Since my gym membership ended in mid January I've gone to a few circuit training classes and tried to keep my overeating and naughtiness to a mininum. However, I weighed myself today and I'm 77 kg- 12 stone 2! Grrr!!! According to compliments recently, I am looking thinner in the last few weeks. Goddamned scales just needs to catch up!! Ha!!After my shitty weigh-in, I worked my ass off in a kettlebell class. Fook, that shit is hard!! Re-joining the gym tomorrow for another three months. I have a huge target set for myself too... My nephew is being christened on Easter Sunday, April 24th. I want to be in and around 11stone. So I'm aiming to lose 14-16lbs in 7 and a half weeks. 2lbs a week sounds doable but will mean curbing my treats, working out 5 times a week and cutting back on my daily intake of calories. The official count will begin tomorrow so get ready for a lot more weight-related updates!

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The first pictures are from Dublin and Wexford! My nephew in Dublin is adorable and I'd a great weekend in Wexford with my cousin and his friends. The other pics are from this weekend at home. I was wearing a really cute high-waisted floral skirt but didnt think to get a photo! I haven't cut my hair btw -it's just pinned back.
Ok so that's about it on the update-front. Feel free to comment! And wish me luck!!! :P

Groceries

I am such a saddo! I love grocery shopping! I just spent €40 today on food that may not even do me the week! Ha!

Mushroom medley
Closed cup mushrooms
Broccoli
Blueberries
Peppers
Birds Eye Chillis
Sugar snap peas
Hot dogs- was craving them!
Carrots
Coriander
Frozen raspberries
Free range eggs
Wholemeal bread
Skimmed milk
Brown rice
Chicken and vegetable soup
Orange and passionfruit juice
Beansprouts
Soy sauce
Diet Coke
Low fat cheese
Deli ham
Fresh noodles
Walnuts
Jelly babies

My big problem now is choosing what to eat for dinner!

Hey!
Got my hair done again. I'm loving the blonder me! I didn't think my hair would lighten so much because it's like one shade from jet black but apparently it can take some bleach!! :D

Lips= Maybelline Pink Punch

I'm still rocking my size 14. Pretty sure my weight is in or around 12 stone. I haven't been at the gym because my membership ran out. Did a few circuit training classes in between but haven't been working out properly in a month so will hopefully re-join next week.Eating has been ok- most days I'm cooking with eggs, chicken, noodles or rice and lots of veg although I've had some naughty weekends/hangover days!Yummy salt/chilli chicken with peppers, garlic and spring onion! mmmmm

My first nephew was born almost a week overdue and weighing in at a generous 8lb 8oz. He's called Finn and he's now 2 weeks old. I'm going to Dublin to see him on Wednesday and I can't wait. While I'm down the South end of the country I'm gonna visit some other relations. My aunt's been at me for ages to visit her in Wexford. My cousin's son is a year and a half old and I'm dying to see him. Plus it'll be nice to get out of town. My cousin and his girlfriend are taking me out Saturday night- yay!

Didn't do anything special for Valentine's day. We had an impromptu gathering at our place on Saturday. We drank Cava and went to the pub. Fun!

Red dress: ASOS (size 12 :) ). Belt, bangles, bag and flower: Penneys/ Primark. Lipstick: Folie de Grenache Givenchy Kiss Kiss. Lashes: Korea
Finn xxx

Toodles all!

Clare Maguire - Ain't Nobody (Breakage Remix Official)